A long row of one hundred jam jars sits outside a stadium, with a small supporter in a white shirt seen from behind and a silhouetted figure in a black padded coat looking on.

TransfersThe High Road Herald

Pavlidis €100m Clause Reported, So Supporter Lines Up One Hundred Jam Jars Outside Stadium

Barry Napier · Transfer Correspondent19 October · Reading time: one pint

Sport Witness reports that Tottenham have made Benfica's Vangelis Pavlidis a priority target ahead of January, and that his contract to 2029 carries a €100 million release clause. The jars were washed first.

A Tottenham man has begun settling the €100 million release clause of Benfica striker Vangelis Pavlidis in instalments, outside the stadium, on a Tuesday with no fixture.

The move follows a report via Sport Witness that Spurs have made the Greek international a priority target as Roberto De Zerbi seeks to address attacking problems before the January transfer window.

The Herald understands the man read the word priority at about ten past seven, read the figure at a quarter past, and was at the cupboard under the stairs by twenty past.

One jar, one million. I've done the sums on the back of an envelope. Well, a different envelope, the first one got wet.

The report adds that the 27-year-old scored 30 goals last season and has 15 goals and four assists in 15 appearances this term, and that he is reportedly keen on the Premier League. The man has taken the last point as encouragement and the first two as terms.

Benfica, the same report says, are determined to keep him and may offer improved terms. The man has not allowed for this. He has allowed for the contract, which runs to 2029, and has marked the jars in sets of ten with a bulldog clip.

At the time of going to press he had filled one jar to the shoulder, chiefly with coppers, and was said to be comfortable with the pace.

Passerby enquiries were met with a request to mind the fourth row.

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A small footballer in a white shirt sits on a huge bench while five megaphones of growing size are aimed at him.

Paper TalkThe High Road Herald

Kulusevski Bench Place Against Coventry Is Reported By Five Outlets, Each Adding A Bolder Verb

Philippa Crane · Media Editor19 October · Reading time: one pint

Roberto De Zerbi said on Sunday that Dejan Kulusevski will be on the bench against Coventry on Monday, and five outlets had reported it by breakfast without adding a single fact.

A bench place for Dejan Kulusevski against Coventry on Monday night was reported by five separate outlets before nine o'clock on Monday morning, the Herald can confirm, and the bench was the same size in all of them.

The original information is understood to be a single sentence from Roberto De Zerbi's Sunday press conference, in which he said Kulusevski would be on the bench after the medical staff gave the okay. It runs to fourteen words and contains no adjective.

By the first outlet it had become Kulusevski named on the bench. By the second he was set for return. By the third he had been handed a place, a verb that suggests a gift, though the club confirms nobody was handed anything but a shirt.

Fourth one said he'd been thrown back in. I looked at the first one again. It said bench.

The man, a Tottenham supporter who read all five at his kitchen table while the toast went cold, said he had checked each for a second source and found that each cited the one before it. He added that he now had a fuller understanding of the bench than of the player.

By the fifth outlet, the Herald notes, the bench had become a dramatic comeback gamble. The piece also confirms that Savio, Pedro Porro and Lucas Bergvall will miss out, which was in the original sentence's neighbouring sentence and has not been improved on since.

Kulusevski has not played since May 2025, a fact all five outlets reproduced faithfully, apart from the one that rounded 500 days up to a lifetime.

The toast was eventually eaten cold, on the bench of a kitchen chair.

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