A tiny figure in a white football shirt, seen from behind, stands in a stadium forecourt beside a giant bag spilling blank leaflets into the air.

Paper TalkThe High Road Herald

Porro Third For Final Third Passes Per TottenhamMuse And Supporter Posts 622 Leaflets Into Forecourt

Philippa Crane · Media Editor15 October · Reading time: one pint

TottenhamMuse reports on X that Pedro Porro has made 622 passes into the final third since the start of last season, behind Virgil van Dijk and Marcos Senesi, and the stadium was closed on Wednesday.

A Tottenham father of two spent Wednesday afternoon delivering 622 leaflets into the final third of the stadium forecourt, in what he described as a matter of proportion.

The figure derives from statistical data published by TottenhamMuse on X, which states that Pedro Porro has played 622 passes into the final third since the start of last season. Only Virgil van Dijk (647) and Marcos Senesi (632) have played more among Premier League defenders.

Jan Paul van Hecke and Manchester City's Marc Guehi follow on 593 each, completing a top five that the original post summarised as three Spurs players. The analysis attached to it calls Porro's role "a central pillar" of the build-up.

The man, who has not been given a role in the build-up of anything, arrived at the closed stadium at around ten past two with a carrier bag and a flask. The leaflets, which advertise a boiler service, were printed the previous evening.

It is not enough to have a view on the numbers. Somebody has to get it into the last third.

He divided the forecourt into three equal zones using a tape measure and a piece of chalk, then posted each leaflet individually through the railings towards the area nearest the turnstiles. He did not count aloud, though his lips were seen to move.

The forecourt was otherwise empty, apart from a pigeon, which was not offered a leaflet on the grounds that it was not an attacking option.

At 622 he sat down on the kerb and was understood to be satisfied, though he has since asked whether Van Dijk's 647 can be reached by Friday.

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Two faceless footballers seen from behind at a breakfast table, with a giant megaphone shouting at a tiny figure while four identical puffs of steam repeat along the table.

Paper TalkThe High Road Herald

Baena £70m Story Is Told Back To Itself Four Times Over Breakfast, Adding Only Volume

Philippa Crane · Media Editor14 October · Reading time: one pint

La Razón reports that Tottenham are ready to enter the race for Atlético Madrid's Alex Baena, with a possible €80m (£69.6m) offer, and Atlético are said to have no intention of selling in January.

A single paragraph about Alex Baena was read at a North London kitchen table on Wednesday morning in four separate versions, none of which contained anything the first did not.

The original appeared on Spurs Web, which reported that, according to La Razón, Tottenham are ready to enter the race for the Atlético Madrid midfielder and could put €80m (£69.6m) on the table. The Herald understands this to be the whole story.

By the second website the offer was ready. By the third it was huge. By the fourth it had become, in the words of the headline, a big statement of ambition, although the figure beneath it remained €80m throughout.

It's on four sites now, so it must be true. That's four sources.

The man was asked whether the four sites might be drawing on the same Spanish newspaper. He said this was a separate matter and returned to his toast.

Also unchanged across all four versions were the injuries to James Maddison, Dejan Kulusevski and Xavi Simons, the €42m (£36.5m) Atlético paid Villarreal in 2025, and the report that Atlético have no intention of parting ways with Baena in January. That last item was read aloud once and has not been mentioned since.

The kettle was reboiled twice. The offer, at press time, had not been made.

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