A small anonymous young footballer in a white shirt knocks on an enormous battered wooden door standing on a training pitch beneath bare trees.

Paper TalkThe High Road Herald

Muslika Under-18 Free-Kick Story Reaches Table Four Times, Each Knocking Louder On The Under-21s Door

Philippa Crane · Media Editor17 October · Reading time: one pint

Gary Ward said on X that Armend Muslika, 17, has drawn attention for goals and a free-kick for Tottenham's under-18s, with calls for a move up, and the Herald counted four retellings by breakfast.

A 17-year-old Albanian youth international's form for Tottenham's under-18s was read out at a North London kitchen table four times on Saturday morning, the Herald can confirm, with the underlying information unchanged throughout.

The source of all four versions is a single post on X by Gary Ward, which said Armend Muslika has been praised for his performances and goals, including a spectacular free-kick, and that calls are growing for him to move up to the under-21s. The Herald understands that is the whole of it.

In the first telling, the midfielder was attracting attention. In the second he had earned acclaim. By the third the acclaim was widespread, and by the fourth the householder was informed of a clamour, which he received with a nod and a second slice.

It started as a bit of attention. By the third one it was a clamour. I'm not saying it's changed. I'm saying it's grown.

The free-kick, described at source as one free-kick, was referred to in the later versions as "set-piece mastery" and "dead-ball artistry". The Herald has checked and it remains one free-kick.

All four versions noted that he kept his place in Jamie Carr's side for the under-18 fixture against Arsenal, which was variously called a derby, a big occasion and a stage. None of them added a score, a minute or a distance.

The calls for promotion were attributed in turn to voices, supporters and analysts. No one at the table could name one, and the householder confirmed that he was not among them, although he has since said he was thinking it.

The toast went cold during the second version.

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A tiny newsagent examines a giant glowing back with a magnifying glass over a shop counter while a footballer in white stands in the rain, seen from behind.

Injury LatestThe High Road Herald

Newsagent Forced To Hear Byfield Back Return Diagnosed Over Counter, Pointed To On Himself Twice

Clive Ottaway · Injury Correspondent17 October · Reading time: one pint

Spurs Web reports that Jun'ai Byfield, 17, has returned from a back injury after five months, coming on after 70 minutes of the Under-21s' 7-6 penalty shootout defeat at Cheltenham, and the shop sold two mints during the diagnosis.

A North London newsagent has been obliged to hear a full clinical account of Jun'ai Byfield's return from injury, delivered across the counter by a regular who came in for a single paper.

The 17-year-old, according to Spurs Web, came on as a substitute on 70 minutes for the Under-21s at Cheltenham in the EFL Trophy. It was his first competitive football in five months, following a back injury suffered in May.

The customer, a Tottenham man, placed a pound coin on the counter at 8:10am and remained for forty minutes. He described the lower back as sound, and indicated its position on his own person, twice, while the till drawer stood open.

It's the back. You don't rush a back. I've got one.

The newsagent, who has served the man since before the roundabout was altered, was then informed that Byfield made three first-team appearances last season, two in the Champions League and one in the Premier League, and that the report calls him versatile. The man listed all three. The newsagent had been present for earlier listings.

He then requested the sweet jar. A pear drop was placed at centre-back, two humbugs were sent to midfield, and a single fruit pastille was deployed at right-back to illustrate the youngster's range. The match, the newsagent was told, finished 2-2 and was lost 7-6 on penalties, with Byfield's own attempt saved. The customer called this a non-issue medically.

The report adds that the player came through the game unscathed. The customer confirmed this was the main thing, and then confirmed it again.

That's one pound ten.

The jar was returned to its shelf two sweets short.

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